i put that as my status on the good old FB the other day while i was in the midst of big decision making with husein.

i found out i was offered my ideal teaching position (3rd grade special ed lead teacher) and – while it couldn’t be part-time – my principal said they could be flexible with the schedule to make it work for me by putting my prep period at the end of the day and leaving a bit early. the hours are still brutal but it’s an improvement. and it would still be the full time salary, benefits, retirement… things that are oh-so-necessary right now.

meanwhile, hus had been offered two separate opportunities to move his roasting into cafes, to take on responsibility there while giving his coffees more exposure.

well. i decided to accept the job offer and hus turned down his and will keep the business home-based so he can be a stay-at-home coffee roasting dad when I start work in july.

I’m trying to see the positive in this as opposed to the one glaring negative which is that I’m going to miss hafiz!!! also, I hate pumping and will be doing a lot of that. Ugh.

BUT let me spell out the positives for myself:
-financial security and independence
-doing work I love (helping struggling students from low-income communities learn)
-hus will do the things i hate like cook, clean, grocery shop, etc
-when I get home at 3:30 or so (most days I hope) it will be cherished time with hafiz while hus goes and works
-school year has great vacations (except not much summer bec I start in July right after completing yoga teacher training! Oh well)
-we might be able to buy a house!! which would hopefully mean living in the neighborhood I adore which happens to be super close to my school (5 min drive I think!)
-money to travel. already have Mexico for New Years planned ๐Ÿ™‚

that’s it I think. not too bad, right? I am most worried about a few things:
-getting enough sleep
-having time to exercise. might be waking up at 5am to work out, yuck. but it can’t happen after school because that’s my hafiz time. hmm. maybe yoga after he goes to bed could work. I can’t do intense anything at night though or I don’t sleep!
-pumping. logistics of it confuse me and also doing it is so boring. though maybe it will be a nice break away from students ๐Ÿ™‚
-MISSING HAFIZ. probably good practice for that whole “letting go” thing that parents have to do when their kids go off to school, sleepovers, trips, college, etc. i keep reminding myself that my mom went back to work when I was 2 months old and I am EXTREMELY attached to her. I spent far more of my childhood with my babysitter Karen or my dad since he is a schoolteacher and had the same hours off as me and yet I’m still closest to my mom.

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me and my boy

okay… my little love WHO IS 5 MONTHS THIS WEEKEND!!! just went to bed meaning it’s clearly breaking bad time.
xo
C

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