i think hafiz is sneakily trying to get his vaccinations pushed back more and more. so i realized my pediatrician rescheduled the appointment from last week to this week, but then yesterday hafiz came down with yet another cold (this one not nearly as bad though, no fever, but super congested little nose!) and when i called the pediatrician this morning to ask if he should still come in for his shots he said no. so we’ll try again next week! 

pretty bummed that the little guy is sick again. i’m sure it’s because 100% of things that come anywhere near him need to go in his mouth. this is yet another one of those parenting decisions that i’m a little torn about. i’m against the idea that you need to constantly sterilize and antibacterialize EVERYTHING your baby comes in contact with because the reality is, you can’t sterilize THE WORLD and they are going to have to be prepared for it. also, antibacterial stuff is actually proven to do more harm than good. but then when i see him sick i worry that i’m too laid back about it. like, i’ve never once asked someone to wash their hands before holding him. i’ve watched him chew on the edge of our rug and didn’t stop him. i do take some precautions, like at a restaurant i wipe the table and highchair with a wet wipe, same with all the surfaces near him on the airplane. so basically in public places i’m more careful. hopefully as he gets older his immune system will get stronger. i’m sure his first year in daycare will be a WILD RIDE for his immune system. eeek! whenever that will be, anyway. 

ok, i actually feel like a lot has happened with hafiz in the last week: 

-food!!! he’s had broccoli, cauliflower, sweet potato and banana. it’s pretty hilarious to watch and, truth be told, he drops A LOT of it. however, as his diaper proved, he is also eating a surprising amount! it’s so flipping cute to watch i can barely stand it. his favorite strategy is to squish food onto his thumb and then suck his thumb. haha. 

-playpen. i bought a joovy room2 which is like a big, square pack n play. i wanted him to get used to sleeping in it since we have lots of travels coming up and that’s where he’ll need to rest. also, i was tempted by the idea of containing him since he has recently been mr escape artist with his floor bed. i’m still switching it up and letting him sleep both places for now (i put the joovy right next to his floor bed so it’s not too confusing for him) but when i can tell he’s pretty riled up and active i just put him straight in the joovy so he can go to town before he falls asleep. and last night he rocked out in there for 2 HOURS before going to sleep. no crying at all, just kicking his legs HARD to make the whole things shake and make an enormous noise on the floor that sounded like an elephant stomping around. and he talked to himself, screeched to himself. break-danced. 

-“crawling.” ok so he’s really not crawling at all BUT he’s getting onto all fours and either pushing himself backwards or lurching forward. he did this for the first time on sunday and has been in constant experimentation mode since. i still think legit crawling is far off but he is definitely getting increasingly mobile. 

that’s it for feezy. now what’s up with me? feeling like a failure at life, if you must know. today i realized i had 12 voicemails on my phone i hadn’t listened to, a bunch of important emails and fb messages that i just didn’t reply to. i would love to say that this is all because i’ve been doing great with me tech-free goals but the reality is i have been using the computer i just have no idea what i’ve been doing exactly.

there have been a ton of house-related things aka so much paperwork i want to scream AND a really fun three hour visit to the IRS office yesterday. i can’t even explain how ridiculous that outing was. we spent the morning at our accountant, then swung by the realtor, then out to the IRS office (none of these places were near one another either) all with a sick hafiz in tow. the IRS office was such a ridiculous experience that i can only laugh about it now. in retrospect. knowing i’ll never go back. there was one lady working there and three people ahead of me in line. somehow, three people took her three hours to attend to. she took 15-30 minute breaks at random intervals, including from 4-4:15 and the office closed at 4:30! we were THIS CLOSE to leaving empty handed after those 3 hours, but thank goodness the security guard, harry, was on our side and convinced the lady to see us in those final 30 seconds since our transaction was an easy one. seriously, why should the security guard be the one making things more efficient? he was also having to translate because 90% of the people in there were mexican and, despite the fact that huge signs in the waiting room said “IRS speaks your language!” everywhere, the lady didn’t speak spanish and when a mexican guy came in there – speaking ENGLISH to her, mind you – she goes “what you trying to say?!!!” super rudely so harry the security guard (who is puerto rican) had to go in there and help. what a great institution. good thing hafiz was a trooper and somehow managed to be chill that whole time. 

as for my sugar goals, i’ve started having some sugar but am totally doing it in moderation so i feel proud of myself. i have a few squares of dark chocolate each night with my capomo and it’s awesome. no desire to binge eat it, either. 

the weather is nice so i’ve started running outside. very short distances but i do sprints (1 min run, 30 sec sprint) to feel like i’m getting an actual workout in 20-25 minutes. 

i’m feeling very bummed because 2 days before my book was supposed to be on amazon they informed me i need to make a small change that could potentially set me back weeks. and i can’t even make the change myself so my old high school physics teacher (one of the nicest people on planet earth) is meeting up with me to help. she understands graphics/computers far better than me. i’m grateful to her but so so frustrated at how the final stages of this book have taken a million months more than expected. 

i’m anxious about a lot of things right now and wondering how i can simplify more. there are a few trips on the horizon that i don’t want to take (wedding in florida in august, work conference in houston in july) and also some trips that i’m excited about but also nervous for logistically (boston for a wedding, chicago for a wedding, missouri to see my grandma) since we close on the house june 20th and want to get a lot done there immediately so we can actually move in. 

blah. writing that down makes me want to cry a little. i need to get away from the computer. no pictures because i’ve sucked with both my phone and new camera these past few days.

womp womp. 

❤ c